Deval's idea of electronic tolls
by Michael Graham
DNN Staff - EXCLUSIVE!
Tuesday, Feb. 16, 2010
Howdy neighbors, I’m Wheelin’ Dealin’ Deval Patrick and have I got a deal for you!
Are you tired of sittin’ in traffic on the Massachusetts Turnpike? Are you fed up with mile-long backups at toll plazas where cranky, overpaid takers won’t even say “good mornin’ ”? Well friend, those days will soon be gone forever!
And all thanks to me - your humble governor - and Deval’s De-Luxe Fly-Through Toll System!
Imagine driving every morning without those annoying stops at I-495, or Natick or Allston-Brighton. No more surly ticket takers or confusing lane changes. Just you, cruising down the open road, that good ol’ country music drifting out of the window of your pickup truck.
Speaking of pickups, have I mentioned that Sen. Scott Brown is a very good friend of mine?
Now, neighbors, I know we’ve had our little misunderstandings over the past three years. There’s the small matter of the sales tax increase. And the toll increases. And the business tax increases. And, well, there’s no point in dwellin’ on the past, folks. We need to focus on the future!
And to my detractors who claim I have abandoned my 2006 pledge to cut property taxes, I just want to say that you couldn’t be more wrong. Not only have I not forgotten my pledge, but I plan to make the exact same promise during the campaign of 2010!
But all of that is water under the bridge - or should I say tickets through the tollbooth - now that I’m leadin’ the charge to get rid of toll booths and toll collectors once and for all. You may have read about this fancy new open-tolling system in the Herald Monday. We just put up a few fancy gizmos that can read your Fast Lane doohickey at highway speeds or scan your license plate on the fly, and we can keep you moving. And keep your money movin’ too, right to Beacon Hill!
It’s fast, it’s easy and you can put the darn things anywhere!
What do my opponents do? They look for ways to attack me - your hard-workin’ servant of the people. They say that because my De-Luxe Fly-Over tolls can go anywhere, I’m gonna stick ’em on every highway, roadway and walkway in the commonwealth.
Who, me?
They say that since it doesn’t mean toll booths or backups, my Beacon Hill colleagues and I won’t be able to resist the temptation of collectin’ millions in new tolls on I-93, I-95, etc., etc.
Then there was that story on WBZ-TV about my former transportation chief, Jim Aloisi, looking at a new-fangled mileage tax because “we can raise a lot of money this way.” Some of you are nervous because ol’ Jim has been studying a program in Oregon where they put chips on your car and charge you by the mile. According to WBZ, we could be testing that idea here in Massachusetts a year from now.
Which is why I, Deval Patrick, friend of the workin’ man, want to assure you that I have no intention of doing any of these things. Why the thought had never occurred to me! Whether it’s fly-through tolls or computer chips on your cars, I am more than happy to leave hundreds of millions of easily-collectible dollars in the driving public’s pockets for years to come!
You have my word. And if you can’t trust your ol’ pal Deval, who can you trust?
UPGRADE: Gov. Deval Patrick is exploring a plan
to install electronic toll booths on the Mass. Turnpike,
which would save millions in toll taker salaries.
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